Kunoichi VS Shinobi
by FallenAngel92
Summary: Moments make us who we are. Series of endless drabbles, and various pairings. Read inside for more info. Rating changes with each chapter. Requests accepted.
1. Kunoichi VS Shinobi

Summary: Moments make us who we are.

This is where I'll keep all my pointless drabbles about various pairings and situations. Mostly NejiTen, SasuSaku, NaruHina, InoShika.

SOC (Summary of Chapter) – NaruHina, Naruto learns who's smarter.

Kunoichi V.S. Shinobi

Everyone's thought about it, the battle of the sexes. Who's better?

Female

Or

Male?

Tenten and Temari are first to shout, "I can do anything a guy can do!" Sakura, Ino, and Hinata nod.

Naruto is first to disagree, "Guys are way better! Who saves your sorry female asses all the time?" Sasuke, Neji, Shikamaru, Kiba, Shino, Kankuro, and Gaara shake their heads and disappear, feeling sorry for the ignorant boy.

Naruto looks up to see four out of the five females cracking their knuckles.

After many bruises, Hinata shyly approaches Naruto, "H-here, Naruto-kun. It'll help h-heal your i-i-injuries…"

Naruto squinted open a swelled eye and grinned, "Thanks, Hinata-Chan. You're the nicest out of all the girls!"


	2. Hair and Eyes

Summary: Moments make us who we are.

SOC– Kunoichi discussing what their children will look like. Pairings should be obvious.

Hair and Eyes

"Mine'll have black hair and green eyes! Cha!"

"Uh huh, well my daughter will have brown hair and lavender eyes. She'll be dangerously beautiful."

"M-my son is going to b-be pale-blue eyed, with blonde h-hair."

"My Daughter will be the prettiest! She's going to have _MY_ beautiful blue eyes and his coffee colored hair!!"


	3. Baby Steps

Summary: Moments make us who we are

SOC– SasuSaku, It's a baby step.

Baby Steps

She whimpers his name, hoping he'll talk to her. He glances toward her, but acts like he didn't even hear her.

It's been a month, and all he's ever done is look. She knows he's mad, but this is going a bit far. He needs to get over it. He has no idea how much she needs this.

Maybe she's being selfish? He was being selfish when he left her all alone. Why can't she take a little instead of always being the giver?!

She asks him to talk to her, tells him how much she and Naruto have missed him. He only looks again.

She's mad now; she screams her love for him. He looks at her longer this time.

"Hn."


	4. Hentai

Summary: Moments make us who we are

SOC– NejiTen, Can he really see everything?

**Warning: Total OOCness!**

Hentai

Tenten wonders about Neji's bloodline trait, she is deep in thought.

Neji asks what's wrong and she blushes. She asks, "Can you see everything?"

Neji frowns.

"You're wearing a red bra."


	5. Sky Eyes

Summary: Moments make us who we are

SOC– InoShika, Why dose he like her?

Sky Eyes

He's thought about it a lot. More than a lot. He thinks about it all the time.

How can he like a girl like her? She's loud, bossy, demanding, did he mention loud?

Ahhh, now he knows.

Her eyes are the color of the sky.


	6. Tease

Summary: Moments make us who we are

SOC– NejiTen, one sided LeeSaku

Tease

Neji was causally walking home after a meeting with Tsunade. He noticed a spandex clad person in the bushed and decided to investigate.

"What are you doing Lee?" asked Neji, who was crouching beside Lee.

Lee jumps and motions for Neji to be quiet, "I know it looks bad, but she is so youthful!"

"Who?" Neji didn't know why he asked, he knew Lee was talking about the pink haired Kunoichi.

Lee opened the bushes; Sakura and Tenten were lying on towels only in their bikinis. Neji scolded Lee, "Haruno will kill you."

"But don't you think it's worth it? Look at our youthful flower, Neji. She has grown into a very beautiful woman."

Neji glanced at Tenten, taking in her now evident curves. When did she get such a body? Surely he would have seen something like that!

Lee and Neji crouched lower when the two Kunoichi sat up.

Tenten gave Sakura a secret smile.

"Should we go topless now?"


	7. My Secret

Summary: Moments make us who we are

SOC– SaiSaku, something no one will ever know.

My Secret

Sakura was warm and very comfortable; it felt like there was a heating pad on her back. Kami knew she needed it. She sighed, and tried to roll over. But something was in the way, when she pushed against it, she was squeezed around the waist.

Their replacement sensei, Naruto, Sai and her had been walking all day, even beat up a few bandits. She remembered falling asleep, Naruto to her left and Sai to her…

Ohhhh.

Sakura immediately turned her head and squinted in the dark, Sai was right there. Turns out the heating pad was Sai's chest.

Ewwww.

Sakura disentangled herself from his person and made a safe distance from him before letting sleep consume her.

Sai smiled, knowing he had copped a feel and Sakura would be less the wiser.


	8. It's a Bitch

Summary- Moments make us who we are.

SOC- NejiTen, SMILE, SUCKER!

This is for SMOKe13, because she/he wanted a longer one-shot and she/he was my first reviewer. I hope you like it.

It's a Bitch

Today was the day Team Gai was getting their picture taken. They've only taken one before but that was back when she was 13, now 16 Gai thought they were overdue. And he had to be dramatic about it.

"_We need to remember your blossoming youthfulness! Don't you want to look back on these youth filled days and remember how handsome Neji was? YOSH?!"_

Tenten grumbled to herself, it seems like everyone knew about her teenage crush on Neji. She should have known better than having a slumber party over Ino's.

She sprayed on a little perfume, knowing how close she'd be standing to Neji. Hey, what can she say? Old habits die hard.

-

Tenten ran to the Team Gai sparring grounds, seeing everyone there but her. She flushed a bit, what would they think of her tardiness?

"Why, what's wrong, youthful blossom? You look pink!" Gai loudly acclaims as she walks to them. Tenten swore under her breath but assured him the run here go her hot. "Then tomorrow, we will all run 20 laps around Konoha, since our blossoming flower is getting tired after a short run! We'll get her back into shape in no time!" Tenten groaned and took her place in front of Gai, and in between her boys.

Tenten felt nauseous thinking about them, how they'd sore to greatness, leaving her alone in Konoha.

The photographer cleared his throat, "Can we get started?"

Tenten glanced at Neji, who had been silently watching her. Tenten smiled and turned back to the camera, but not without keeps an eye on him.

The photographer disappeared behind the tripod, "3…"

Tenten smiled, noting Neji was still frowning. She could hear her heart thudding in its cage, _tha thump…tha thump. _The world seemed to slow down and stop.

"2…"

Neji never smiles in our group photos, frantically thought Tenten, this may be our last one and he's going to ruin it!

She made her decision.

"1…"

Tenten tuned and maneuvered slightly behind Neji.

"Smile!"

Tenten quickly reached in front of Neji and hooked her pointer fingers inside the corners of his mouth, forcing him to smile. She positioned her face beside his and smiled brightly.

The camera clicked just in time, the flash momentarily blinding them.

"TENTEN?!" gasped Gai.

Tenten removed her fingers and wiped the Neji salvia on her red pants, "What?! He never smiles in our pictures!"

The photographer shrugged, "Sorry I don't have time for another, and you'll get the photo in by tomorrow."

Rock Lee fell over laughing, causing Neji to scowl. He turned to Tenten and muttered the word that will cause her to double check all her locks at night.

"Payback."


	9. Never Again

Summary: Moments make us who we are.

SOC- InoTemari (friendship) Shikamaru bashing.

Got this idea from a pic on Deviant Art I don't know the link, but go to my Deviant Art page –located on my profile- and it should be in the 'InoShika' Folder. If its not in my faves or anything...PM me and I'll get you the link. It's the fanart where Shikamaru is crawling away from the two blondes who are gossiping about him.

Never Again

"-SAW HIM FIRST!"

"SO? HE LIKES ME MORE!"

Shikamaru began to fade from the scene, wishing he'd never brought Temari to see the flowers, he _had_ to take her to the only flower shop around here….Yamanaka Flowers. How could he be so stupid?

"HE'S MY TEAMMATE!"

"I DON'T CARE!"

He silently hid behind a row of daffodils.

"YOU SHOULD!"

"Oh YEAH, Nice come back!"

"ANY way, he and I are soul mates, he told me himself!"

"…"

"Uh, Sand Bitch. There are supposed to be two girls in a cat fight!"

"He told you that, did he?"

"Ah, yea. A week ago to be exact."

"He told me I was an angel from heaven!"

Shikamaru wished he could crawl in a hole.

"How corny!"

"I know, right? So the first time he kissed me, his hands were every where!"

"I know! It's like he doesn't even know what to do!"

"So has he said anything about other women?"

"Hah! I asked him about you one time and he said 'You know you're the only one for me'. LAAAAME!"

"Like, where dose he get his lines? The internet?"

Shikamaru flushed.

"Right, right. Pick up lines dot com?"

The two blondes burst out laughing.

" 'Ohh, I love you so much, koi!'"

" 'Your hair is so beautiful!'"

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Shikamaru swore off women that day.


	10. Sakura

Warning

She knew they wanted each other. The second long glances and tinted cheeks were all the evidence she needed.

But of course, the other would never know, because they needed to be a team. Love was too dangerous, with all its What-Ifs. The trust would always be needed, so to think of some affair breaking that trust would be a downfall of a team.

Love was something shinobi and kunoichi could not afford to feel.

And all of her comrades sobered and forgot of that _childish_ dream in her presence. Anytime _his_ name was mentioned, her face would become lost.

She was the warning to her comrades; love is a dangerous game.


	11. He's Not THAT Bright

"Dare ya."

Shikamaru glared at the loud blonde boy. "She'll kill me."

"Chicken." Naruto began flapping his arms like wings.

Shikamaru cursed. "You're Chunin, stop that."

Naruto stopped. "If you don't…I'll tell Ino what happened to her purple thong."

Shikamaru flushed. "In this case," he began. "I'd choose the lesser of two evils, but in _this_ case. There is none."

"But," pointed out Naruto. "You get to cop a feel from Temari. _Now_ she has some boobies! Sakura-chan…I can't say as much…"

Shikamaru slapped the back of Naruto's head. "Don't talk about Temari's boobs."

Naruto sighed, "See ya."

"Where are you going?"

"To have a little chat with Ino."

"Stop!"

Naruto grinned. "Just go over there, accidentally fall, and bam! Squishy breasts!"

Shikamaru ran over a game plan in his head. "Too troublesome… Fine, fine."

Naruto watched his friend walk across the street and waited for it.

.

.

.

"KYAHHHH! HENTAI!"

Naruto winced as the outraged female's giant fan pummeled the man.


	12. PayBack, That Is

Tenten walked into town and noticed the stares and whispers. She brushed it off quickly.

When she walked in Tsunade's office, Tsunade and Shizune jumped like they'd be caught doing something naughty. When Tsunade saw her, she grinned knowingly, Shizune blushed and covered her nose.

"You called, Tsunade-sama?" asked Tenten. She began to feel like there was a joke and she was the only one who didn't know it's innuendo.

Tsunade nodded and motioned for her to come forward. "These were posted on everyone's doors, all around Konoha." Tsunade handed her a blown up picture of herself in her bra and panties, her hair was down and a green moisturizing mask covered her face!

Tenten's face turned red. "HYUUGA NEJI! YOUR ASS IS MINE!"

.

.

.

.

Neji smirked. "Payback."


	13. Cruel Kunoichi

This was her way of testing him. Her evil ways of getting inside his head and driving him to madness. Sometimes, he rally hated her for it.

_Tenten leaned over a kissed Neji on the cheek, mere centimeters from his own lips. She grinned as she pulled back. She ruins it of course, by saying: "Lee and I have missed you so much, Neji!"_

_"You are such a cruel kunoichi." Neji whispers quietly._

Neji decides next time, he will not be honorable with her innocence and nativity.

* * *

Everyone assemble in the living room, we need to have an Authoress/Reviewer heart-to-heart!

**I am accepting requests!** Please do it in **your review** or **PM me** or go to my profile oooor **PM my collaboration with _xmarachanx_**_.  
_

Always Yours,  
Angel :)


	14. Birdie Bastard

_He wants to fly._

"He wants to fly," repeated Tenten. "I'll send him flying."

And she did.

* * *

Thanks to **Hiei's Cute Girl**, she inspired this one.


	15. She's Kinky Like That

Request for mah dear friend, Mara! Wuv you, girl! I'm starting to like this ShikaTema, y'know?

She's Kinky Like That.

"You're going down, little girl!"

"In your dreams, old lady!"

Shikamaru and Neji huddled together in a bush in the training field. They'd been watching two kunoichi fight for hours.

The younger one with her new techniques and determination.

The older one with her dominate behavior and arrogance.

Temari stood 165cm with a proud aura surrounding her at all times. She was never afraid to speak her mind and was often referred to as crude when it came to her battle techniques. Taunting was one of her many great talents. Her dark green eyes brightened at the thought of a _challenging_ battle. Wind was her champion. Her iron fan was attached to her at the hip.

Tenten stood 164cm with her infamous hairstyle. Sheer determination and strength kept her going through the many nights of rigorous training. In one world that would define her whole being: determined. When she sat her mind to something, she would have it. No matter the cost. Weapons to her were like byakugan to the Hyuuga's. When it came to losing, ferocity had nothing on her.

"You actually call yourself kunoichi?" sneered Temari. "You're nothing but a worthless girl. What a boring battle."

"If it's so boring," retorted Tenten. "Why'd you accept? Or are you going to forfeit like your boyfriend did in the Chunin exams?"

Temari unleashed a giant whirlwind that Tenten dodged. "That lazy bum isn't my boyfriend!"

Shikamaru began to leave.

"Where do you think you're going, Nara?" asked Neji.

"Too troublesome."

Neji grabbed the so called genius and threw him out of the bushes, right in the middle of the kunoichi.

"Nara!" yelled Temari.

"Where you spying on us?!" asked Tenten. Shikamaru pointed to the bushes. Tenten threw a shuriken into the shrubbery and Neji jumped out. Tenten flushed. "Neji!"

Neji glared at the other male and disappeared in a cloud of smoke, Tenten followed after him with a, "Oh no you don't!"

Temari folded her fan and smirked at the browned haired man. She pulled out a kunai.

"Ever heard of bondage?" the blonde woman purred.

Shikamaru gulped.


	16. What were YOU thinking!

"Oh...God!"

"Yes! Right There!"

"Harder!"

"Ooooh, right there!"

"Right there!"

"Kyahh!"

"Ouch!" Tenten jerked her foot away from the skilled hands of her team mate. "That hurt!" she snapped.

Neji's faced was flushed. "That."-pause-"Had."-pause-"To."-pause-"Stop."

* * *

I'm badddddd.


	17. Canon

"IKNOWYOULIKESAKURA-CHANANDIHOPEI'MGOODENOUGHFORYOUBEFORESHEREALIZESHOWGREATYOUARE! I'VEALWAYSADMIREDYOUANDIREALLYLIKEYOU,NARUTO-KUN!"

Naruto stared at the fleeting figure of Hinata. He didn't even catch a word she'd said.

"Weirdo." mumbled Naruto, he continued his walk to get some ramen.

* * *

This is totally canon. XD


	18. Comparisons

steffiepoo. wanted a another ShikaTema. I don't know if it's funny but I thought it was hilarious.

Comparisons

"Pants down now." commanded Temari. Her kimono had been discarded ages ago along, her hair was down and her green eyes were fogged with desire.

Shikamaru was happy to comply. He'd come to visit the sand on his vacation and ended up in Temari's office. She sat on her desk and smiled bashfully at him.

Temari wrapped her legs around his hips and pulled him forward.

"Temari!" The door banged open against the wall and entered Kankuro and Gaara. They stared wide eyed at the scene.

Temari shrieked and flipped over her desk to hide behind it. Shikamaru turned, still naked, and waved at her brothers.

"Um, this is really troublesome."

Gaara's eye twitched, he sand whipped Shikamaru in the face. "Get out of here and stop molesting my sister."

Shikamaru jerked up his pants and ran out past the two brothers, not even sparing his lover a glance.

Temari glared at her brothers. "Ever heard of knocking!?" she demanded.

Kankuro ignored her and turned to Gaara, with the most serious expression. "Did you see how big his d!ck was?"


	19. Teenage Boys

"-Because I love you."

Her face, so sincere and determined, made him want to love her. She was the only girl to ever tell him she loved him and he'd give anything to return the feeling.

But, Naruto will be Naruto, and his second thought was:

_I wonder if she'll let me touch her boobies...

* * *

_

You know he was thinking it. And who wouldn't? Hinata has such big boobies. DON'T LIE! I know you've thought about it! Like, I wonder if she got a boob job?

Naruto is just 15, horomones and all. :D


	20. Youtube

Youtube.

"Come on." insisted Ino. "If you totally haven't...you're not my friends anymore!"

The other four girls avoided looking at the platinum blonde, they're faces a light red color.

"I did..."

Sakura, Tenten, Ino, and Temari jerked their heads in the direction of the voice.

"Hinata?!" exclaimed Tenten.

"Just once!" corrected the Hyuuga Heiress.

Ino giggled. "Ohh, please share!"

Hinata's face deepened in color. "I, um... about three months ago, Naruto was training with Neji, Lee, and Tenten in my family's dojo-"

"I remember that!" said Tenten. "Neji asked you to help Naruto and while you were practicing, Naruto slipped and feel right on top of you!"

Hinata nodded. "My hand was caught..."

Ino gasped and fell off the bed, her laughter filling the room. Temari picked up a floral pillow and hit the other blonde. Ino growled and threw the pillow back.

"Oh that's it!" hissed Temari, she jumped off the bed and landed on top of Ino.

Sakura giggled and got out her camcorder. "This is so going on Youtube."

Tenten sat in front of Hinata. "Want to know something on your oh-so-smart cousin?"

Hinata blinked and nodded. "Like blackmail?" she asked.

"Kind of." replied Tenten. "But you can never tell where you heard it, okay?"

Hinata nodded. "Okay."

Tenten leaned in. "During training one day, Neji was killing me with his 64 palms, so at the last couple of hits, he totally grouped me."

Hinata gasped. "Really?" She giggled.

"Really. It was a grab and squeeze."

"What was a grab and squeeze?" asked Sakura, her camcorder pointed toward them.

"Did you just record that whole conversation?" hissed Tenten.

Sakura smirked. "Yep."

"Gimme that stupid thing!" yelled Tenten, she lunged toward Sakura. Sakura gave a squeal as they both tumbled off the bed.

Hinata picked up the discarded camcorder and began recording the wrestling matches between her four friends.

"Get off me, you bimbo!"

"Who you calling bimbo, you retard!"

"Tenten! I'm gonna kill you!"

"You can try pinkie!"

Hinata giggled. 300+ subscribers, here she comes.

* * *

Someones got youtube on the brain!


	21. Turning Tables, Darling

"You want so bad to fall." she observed. "You want to risk it all."

He moved to kiss her.

Sakura dodged him and placed a short kiss on his forehead.

"But right now...it's not your call." she whispered.

* * *

So here's a random SasuSaku drabble. I'M NOT DEAD. Based on xXxLoveNDreamsxXx's 'Watch Our Love Come To Life' SasuSaku Vid. GO NOW!


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